Our Christmas wasn't bad we went to my parents house on Sunday for dinner and gifts with my family. My sister and her kids were there. I guess it was nice last time we even knew where they were at Christmas the boys were babies and the girls weren't even around yet. That was about 9 years ago....... There is a long story about the history with my sister and I am not totally to ready talk about it on the internet yet (I know that came out weird). We have only seen my sister on Christmas since my nephew was born (he's now 22) about 3 times, they only remember the one 9 years ago. It was a good visit and my grandmother was there also, she never comes because she always spends it with my uncle Tony he has MS and doesn't get out much anymore but even before that we didn't really spend Christmas with them either he has an issue with my parents because they are Christian and he basically doesn't believe in God its not such a bad thing though because he smells like marijuana from a mile away (he got a medical marijuana card for the MS although that just means he uses it legally now unlike the many years he did it before the MS). I have some good pictures from the day though
Here are the girls with my dad Madison was taking pictures.
My nephew and his girlfriend who also happens to sub at the kids school and has subed in Kenzies class before. They are engaged I wonder if they get married would it make a difference if she was teacher one of her cousins??
Kids opening presents at Grandma and Papa's house.
All the cousins together we don't have any pictures of them all together except 9 years ago and that was minus my 2 little girls here this time Roger is now 22 and engaged to be married so she gets in on the picture also and the kids just seem so big last time 3 were still babies!
I say we had a good visit with reservations though I was happy my mom was happy we were all together and I am trying really hard to make sure things work with my sister and her family staying around but everytime we do something with them I spend my time holding back a lot there is so much I really want to get out, you know, to say to them for where the last 9 years have gone. The not seeing them has nothing to do with me or my family or parents it is something that always happens when we get back in thouch with them they are around for a few months then disappear within the city for several years, so much time goes by and I grow up a little more and really need to protect my kids from that kind of experience but I don't know how. I mean I want to know the kids and maybe actually have a sister again since I really haven't had one since I was 7 myself but I feel like I can't count on it to keep up the way it is I always feel like I can't get my hopes to high and get to excited about it because I know from experience that when everything crashes it hurts that much more each time. Also I don't want my kids to experience that hurt and have to try to explain to them that it may not last.
Sorry this post is not so happy for parts but it is my journal of sorts and I don't feel like I can really discuss anything with anyone right now, I guess writing it out gets it out a little. There is so much more I could go into but like I said right now I am really not ready for it.
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