It hit me today....

Kelly leaves on Wednesday that means just 4 days from now. I know I have been saying its coming soon for awhile but, it hit me today.

I just felt kind of off all day. I wasn't in a terrible mood or depressed or anything just kind of off....

I could tell he could see it and he didn't really know why and I didn't want to say anything because he is really busy right now and a bit stressed.....but honestly I can't beleive by this time next week he will be gone and I won't see him for 4 months. We have been together for 14 years and never seperated for more then a week or 2. I married him right out of high school and was never on my own really. He has always been the one to deal with the bills and making sure they get paid and he is much better when it comes to disciplining the kids.

I worry I am going to screw something up bills, kids, etc..... I'm I being crazy?

I went out on a girls night with some friends from work tonight we had fun and it was actually good for me. I had thought about backing out since he is leaving but decided it would probably be good for me to get out for a bit and think about something else.

Anyway sorry for whining....I just needed to get it out

Do you collect anything?

This is my second post today so don't miss the first one!

I have a question. Does anyone else collect things? I would love to hear what other people collect and see pictures of your collections.

I have collected dolls of some kind since I was younger. First started with Cabbage Patch kids. I had 21 of them all in perfect condition until my kids came along.

I also collected Precious Moments figurines I have a lot of those and actually still collect them. My friend Hannah and I both collected them and it always made it easy for gift giving to each other. Since you can find them with meanings behind them. I bought them for her when she graduated from high school, got married and when both of her babies where born. She has done the same for me. It also gives people who buy me a gift an easy time since I don't buy them as much for myself anymore they can always find one I don't already have. I was surprised when I graduated and I got three different graduation figures and all were different!

So the reason I bring this up? My newest doll collection is a little different. A little more spendy also but oh so cute. They are the Ashton Drake So Truly Real Dolls I have 4 now although the girls think that 2 of them belong to them but they are collectable so they don't get to really play with them.

These 2 are the ones the girls consider theirs.

The one with the closed eyes is aWelcome home Emily doll and the one with the opened eyes is

Emily's Loving Eyes.











These 2 are my twins Sweet Dreams Matthew and Gentle Dreams Madison.

They are actually really life like and Kelly says they freak him out sometimes. They are made of silicone/vinyl so they are made of a very soft material. They are also weighted to about 5-6 pounds each. They wear 0-3 and 3-6 month clothing so as you can wear the kids old baby clothes. Which they are doing in these pictures. They don't come with the pacifiers but I get the stuff I need off of ebay and with a little "surgery" as the kids call it you put a magnet in the heads and cut the nipple off of a regular pacifier, put a magnet on that and they look like they take a real pacifier. Honestly though I just think they are cute and another extension of my collecting. The girls do get to take them out with us on shopping trips and its funny how many looks I get from people thinking it is terrible I would let my little girls carry around such a small baby! They think its funny and like to fool people with them.

Kelly just thinks its my way of pretending to have my own babies again. I just like the fact I have some use for some of my favorite clothes from when the kids were little. I am a huge pack rat and just can't bring myself to get rid of their sweet little baby clothes.

So do you collect anything?

Hello

So I am feeling a little better with the cold thing but still have a nagging cough and today a big headache that is a little irritating.

Kelly has been good though since he is home he working on stuff around the house. He has actually gotten a lot of laundry done and helped clean the house which it was in dire need of! Seriously!

Only a week from today he will be leaving!

Doesn't he look happy to have his picture taken??? Yeah not so much he doesn't like to have his picture taken much...

So he has done a lot being home! I'm most happy since he fixed my Durango

See him working on it!

I love watching my man doing his work....he hates it when I take his picture though

Does Izzak look like he is being much help??

I made him go to the eye dr and his regular dr on Tuesday though before he goes just to make sure he is okay. His regular dr appt went well his bp is a little up but he is on meds for that and I think it is mostly due to stress right now. Although he has had mildly high blood pressure for awhile. His eyes are great. He uses glasses when driving for distance but doesn't have to wear them much. Also was good because this is the same eye dr Madison and Joshua see. Madison had eye surgery at 2 and he sees her every 6 month like clockwork so we let him know we would be moving and he made sure to tell us who we are to see for her when we get to Alaska. Madison is his favorite patient so he is a bit protective to make sure she see's the right person so it wasn't one of those this is one who works up there it was this is who she has to see, okay! haha I love that dr though. Another one I am afraid to lose when we move. Kelly did get new glasses and we took Joshua's in to get fixed so he has no excuse to not wear them.

See I honestly think he looks cute with his glasses on but he doesn't like to. How do you explain to the 10 year old that either he wear his glasses that actually look good on him or when he gets older his eyes will continue to cross worse? I can't figure out to get it into him that if he doesn't wear them he will regret it someday when he is older and his eyes cross.

In case you are wondering about his shirt? The rest of it says "this is what trouble looks like" it fits perfectly....

Our Weekend

First of all I am so glad everyone is likeing the new blog template. I give all the credit to Wendy!

I'm feeling much better today but I wanted to tell you about our weekend!

We are trying to do alot of things together on weekends so we can spend time together before Kelly leaves in 9 days. I can't beleive he will be leaving in 9 days!

We didn't do to much Saturday but Kelly bought his trailer for the trip and that took some time

Kelly had a lot to do to get it ready. Also we sold his International Scout! And it looks like we might have someone to buy the other truck. Oh yeah I never mentioned when he bought his truck that he already had one? Well yeah he did and the purchase of the new one made us the proud owners of 5 vehicles....can we say a little bit redneck around here? Anyway one down maybe another and we are down to a more managable 3. Why we have 3 vehicles? Honestly I don't know the Durango is mine and that is all I think about, okay!

On Sunday the weather was beautiful and we decided to go to the beach! I love the beach by the way. The sound the smell. It makes me happy!

We got out late so when we got there is what lunch time so we stopped at a restaurant for lunch. Joshua has just been graduated (by us) to the adult menu as the kid menus don't have enough food to satisfy his never ending hunger so he ordered a hamburger. Okay this place serves huge meals and I don't think he realized what a hamburger at this place looked like. Do you think his mouth is big enough for this...........

Apparently Kenzie thought it was too funny!

We browsed some of the shops and then made our way down to the beach....

And of course I did get my traditional picture of Izzak enjoying just looking out into the beach.

One of my favorite shops to go to at the beach is a candy shop. They make the salt water taffy on site and you can watch them make it. Its really neat to watch. I usually get some of that for Kelly who is a taffy fan and for my self I get a bag of fresh warm carmel popcorn...mmm. I usualy let the kids pic out a treat as well and of course Joshua doesn't pick out something normal. What did he choose.....

A 3 foot gummy snake! eww......

Under Construction!

Wendy is helping change my blog around for new more brighter feel so if you notice things are looking a little different or missing they that is what is going on! I am really excited as I've had the old design since starting this blog last year and ready for a new view!

Do You Realize.....

......At three minutes and four seconds after 2 AM on the 6th of May this year, the time and date will be 02:03:04 05/06/07.

This will never happen again.

No I haven't been thinking about it much a friend told me! I'm to sick to actaully realize this on my own!

Because you need to know more about me part 7

Okay today was actually a really nice day and went to the beach but I am sick today so I am going to post about it tomorrow hopefully because I got alot of really good pictures and even though I wasn't feeling well I had fun. I have already decided to take the day off because at the moment I have no voice so obviously cannot do my job very well! so I am going to post my last list of 5 questions.

Todays questions come from Ellie at The Cedar Chest .

1. If you never married and had children what is one thing you would have liked to do with your life?

Honestly Ellie, I have no clue. From the time I was a little girl I wanted to get married and have babies. I know sounds weird doesn't it? Before I married Kelly and had Izzak I wanted to be a Nannie. I'm just a kid person I guess. Thats one of the reasons I hate working so much I just want to be with my kids and be a mom

2. Name a moment that stands out in your mind that defines who you are today.

I don't know if there was any one moment. Although when Izzak was born he was born with a birth defect that required surgery before he turned a year. We had to be more cautious with him as he was more prone to infections. Growing up us kids were all pretty normal no health issues no surgeries, nothing. I had in my perfect little world not thought things would be any different for me and my family. I was very wrong. I beleive from the moment we were told something was wrong with him we grew up a lot quicker (we were only 19). I became a different mother then I had planned as my parenting view did not involve frequent drs visits and specialists. It wasn't a huge thing in the grand scheme of things but it kind of prepared me for what all we have faced with our kids. I learned that my perfect little boy/girl didn't have to be what everyone else deems as "perfect".

3. Favorite comfort food is?

Baked potatoes with lots of cheese and bacon!

4. Do you have a special talent you wish you could use, but there is no time for it right now, if so, what is it and if you had the time, how would you use that special talent?

I don't know if I have a special talent.. I scrapbook and like to put things together and my mother and friends say I am talented there. But honestly I can't put my creativity into use anywhere else. My house definetly is not creative!

5. Country or City Life? Tell me why or why not.

I imagine a country life. Only because at this point I just want some peace in our lives. We have had so many problems with neighbors that I would love to live somewhere I didn't have to see anyone when I walk out my front door.


If you wanna play, here’s what you do.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions

Corn on the cob and no front teeth *update on Elaina*

Did you know its not an easy thing for a child with no front teeth to eat corn on the cob??
It was the boys idea they knew how hard it would be. I tried to warn her but she insisted....

See she has no teeth up front other then the two at the bottom. She is missing 4 on top and two on the bottom. How does this child eat??? Especially corn on the cob?

Apparently it takes a special trick. You have to shove it to the side and eat with your molars. Hmm much easier said then done....

As you can see McKenzie thought this was very interesting.

There rest of us found it funny, Honestly we were laughing with her, not at her......

See she was doing a pretty good job. Oh but what a mess her face was when she was done.

I just went over to Wendy's blog and Elaina has been release! No answers yet but she is doing better! Mom just has to make sure she stays well hydrated.

Because you need to know more about me part 6

These questions came from Amy at A Family Story. Really I am surprised no one has come up with the same questions!

1. Would you vote for Hilary Clinton because she is
female or because of her views?

This is a hard one. I couldn't vote for her just because she is a female. I don't think there is anything wrong with a female president. And would be all for it if it happened. I just couldn't vote for her just because she was female. Also honestly right now I am not really paying a lot of attention to who is running for president yet. I don't like to listen until it is narrowed down to the two who are running. Before that there are to many people and I don't like to listen to the news anyway. My decision on wether I vote for her when and if she is one of the ones to run when it is time would depend on her views and how she runs her campaign.

2. Are you particular with your brands for toilet
paper or just buy what's on sale?

This is a silly question.. hehe... The funny part is I don't really care as long as it gets the job done! The hubby on the other hand? He is the picky one. He likes it to be soft. He buys it and usually picks between the more expensive brands but whichever one is on sale. I think it is funny but that is my hubby for you. Particular about the t.p.

3. What is your favorite children's book?

My favorite books myself as a child were ther Shel Silverstein books. I didn't have one favorite I like them all. I was into poetry when younger and that fact his poetry is so silly was even better! My favorite book for my kids has always been I'll Love You Forever By Robert N. Munsch. I still say the words to my kids. Izzak knows the words and when Madison was a baby he would sing the words to her I'll love you forever
I'll like you for always
As long as I'm living
My baby you'll be!

4. You have to watch a cooking show or Wheel of
Fortune for 12 hours straight. Which would you
choose?

Probably Wheel of Fortune although I would get irritated at the people on the show for not getting the easy ones right! I used to love this show.

5. What is your favorite flower and why?

I love roses! My dad used to have long rows of rose gardens and he had up to 57 different varieties at one time. Roses and Rhodedendrons are the only plants I can keep alive. Everything else dies at the very thought of me coming near them.

If you wanna play, here’s what you do.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Also please don't forget to check on Elaina and Wendy they still don't have results back yet and poor little Elaina is really upset and irritated and not getting a lot of rest. To much poking for a little 2 year old! She is outputting more then she is taking in even with the iv fluids. I know how frustrating this can be we have been in the hospital with the kids before without knowing what was wrong and thats really hard on everyone. That and you just can't get a good night sleep in a hospital with your kids sick!

A request for Wendy and Elaina

I have to make a request from my blogging friends....
There is another blog I read and I know most of you don't read hers regularly but I feel I need to direct you to her blog tonight. Please go to Wendy's blog at A Day In Our Life her little girl Elaina who is 2 has been admitted to the Hospital today for high fevers a blood in her diaper and her blood counts are off. Suggesting she is fighting a big infection. Some of the tests won't be back until tomorrow so they have a night of waiting ahead of them. Please go by and let her know people are thinking of her, I know she loves to get comments on her blog. Also to top it off its her little boys birthday today.

Because you need to know more about me part 5

This set of questions came from Nailgirl at cameronscorner . I figured she deserved to be able to ask me questions after the list I gave her. Hopefully I didn't scare anyone off with her questions. I haven't gotten any one else ask for me to question them.... I was impressed by her honesty and hope I didn't ask to much!

1. Why do you want to move to Alaska? How did you pick this state? Will you have to get a job once you get there or will be ble to be a sahm?

I don't know exactly where we first decided we wanted to move to Alaska. We originaly started talking about it a long time ago actually. Kelly was sent there several times by his work to different sites and he really liked it up there. I have always wanted to go to Alaska but don't know exactly why?
Kelly has wanted to move to anywhere actually for several years but knew I didn't want to because of my family being so close by. It finally came down to me deciding I was done with where we live now. I'm not sure I can place exactly what specifically made me decide I didn't care to be here anymore. Probably a whole lot of factors. One thing is the way the economy is here Kelly can't make as much as he could almost anywhere else. The houses are out of this world for what people make and the schools? Well to be honest they just suck! Case in point would be Izzak. I kept telling myself when we would have to move that it had to get better working with the schools but it never has...it just gets worse. I know Alaska has some really good homeschooling programs including one that is a charter school type thing but all homeschooling. This particullar one we would be able to do everything at home but he would also have access to extra help with his IEP (Individualized Education Plan).
I don't know I guess we are justing looking for something new. We feel like we are stuck in a rut here and won't ever get out of where we if we stay here.
I do know that I will miss my family and close friends terribly but I have to choose what we think may be the best for our family. My health before I was working was much better. Since working my depression got really bad, I have terrible anxiety attacks unless taking beta blockers to help. My health is a mess...my kids are a mess. I just can't help but think if I can get back to focusing on my family that we might get better or at least I can spend more time trying to figure things out. I guess that answers the last part of the question. I plan to not work. I want to go back to being a SAHM. I was much happier then even though we were broke most of the time.

2. Did you and the Mr decide before hand to have four kids?

Well, when we discussed having kids Kelly wanted to 2 I wanted 4. We agreed to having 3. About 3 months before we found out Madison was coming Kelly started talking about wanting to maybe have another but wanted to wait till Kenzie was 3 to start trying. Well I have never been able to take birth control, it just really messes me up. Apparently my body decided that was an okay and we found out 3 months later we were having another and she would be here just after Kenzie turned 2. I had a hard pregnancy with her though. Also after having Joshua I can only have c-sections and with Joshua I had a classical incision. The doctors were worried about me having a 3rd pregnancy and c-section so I was watched pretty carefully. Between the doctors worries that my body couldn't handle another c-section and Kelly not wanting to have more then 4 we decided I would get my tubes tied. So no more babies for me. Although if I could get pregnant again I would love to have another baby. No more then that but I do still feel like there was one more out there for us. Does that sound strange??

3. Do you ever feel like you missed out on seeing the world, or spreading your wings so to speak. Since you married and had kids at such a young age?

I was married at 18 just after graduating and before ever moving out of my parents house. I don't really know what I missed. Both Kelly and I have had periods in our marriage where we have gone through wondering what we missed out on. Around our 5th-7th years of our marriage we were having alot of problems, no one ever did anything we just argued alot but we were about 23-25 at the time and most of our friends were still running around having fun and going to parties but we had 4 kids so we couldn't really do that. Sometime into the 7th year we kind of grew up and our marriage got stronger then it was even before our problems.
We both sometimes wonder what we would have been like had we waited to get married until he came home from school but to be honest it was a good experience for us when we first got married so young to be away from our parents. We always say it kept us from running home to mommy and daddy everytime we were upset with each other and it made us have to learn how to live and love each other.
I wouldn't change anything though. I love my husband and my kids to much to think about us having done anything different. If we did would are kids be the same people they are? I like who they are. We don't have any issues of former boyfriends/girlfriends and comparing each other because we were each others first real boyfriend/girlfriend. This may be a little TMI but we were each others first in every way. I like to be able to say that!

4. what is your favorite childhood memory?

Honestly I don't have any memories of anything before I was 8. Only memories are from pictures and what my family tells me. The only thing I remember was when my sister got pregnant at 16. It was really bad and there was a lot of problems with her. My dad was away on a deployment with the military, my brother was hell on wheels and only 8 himself. Then to end the year a friend of mine who was a little older and was basically my support through all this died suddenly. I had a dream when she died about it the same night and it totally freaked me out. My mom came in to tell me and I said I know.... So much was going on I basically blocked it out and lost a lot of other memories along with it. I also kind of fell into this depression thing for a couple of years but hid it from my parents I was one of those kids who didn't tell my parents things like that because I didn't want them to be upset....
The only other thing I can think of was that when I was 9 we moved to this house that had a huge tree in the back yard. I spent many days in that tree. I felt free from everyone and everything and could just sit back and breath.....

5. Other then the Mr who is your biggest supporter? I never hear you refer to a best friend.

I have 2 really close friends. I don't always talk about them because they are mine and I don't share...haha. No really I don't share and friends? I have always been the type who like to have friends to myself.
My first one though I have known the longest it will be 17 years that I have known her next month. Her name is Hannah she is also Becci's SIL now. She has two beautiful babies now that I love to spoil. I spoil her to though. She is a couple of years younger then me but I have always felt more like she was a sister. I call her kids my neice and nephew. And my kids consider her to be their Aunt. She has always been one of those people I can shar my thoughts with and she knows more about me then anyone other then Kelly (although there are things she knows that he doesn't). She stuck by me through my teen years and to be honest she put up with alot. I consider her family to be part of my family as well. Honestly if there was ever anything I could do for her I would bend over backwards to do it. I love her like a sister and she will probably be the person I miss the most when I move. Both her and Becci keep telling me I need to fly them up to visit and I would probably do that!



The other one would be my friend Cori. I don't know what I would have done without her when we lived in Arizona after Kelly and I got married. He worked and went to school full time during the weekdays he would be gone from 6 am to 9 pm. She was the first person I told that I was pregnant with Izzak and she took me to every drs appt and wic appointment I had. I spent all my time when Kelly was gone with her and she was actually the one who drove me and Izzak home from the hospital after he was born. She lives in Washington now and I still talk to her several times a week. She and Hannah are the first ones I call when I am frustrated. I tell her I wouldn't have made it in Arizona without her. We became friends within a couple of days of our arriving and like I said I owe her a lot for getting me through those times. She was in the same place as we her husband was in school and working full time also and she had a 1 year old when we moved there and was pregnant soon after we arrived.

Both of these people are like sisters to me.

On another note only 1 1/2 weeks till Kelly leaves for Alaska. He is getting so nervous about it, I can tell! He has been great though. He's trying to take care of things and make sure I have things. In the last week he bought me a new computer that he had built up for me for my needs. Part of this was he wanted to take a computer up for himself so he is taking the older one. He also wants to be able to take pictures and so he bought me a brand new digital camera..its so tiny its about the size of a deck of cards and is 7.2 mega pixel so it takes great pictures. Also he fixed my Durango that has been undrivable since my accident in February it needed new brakes, a new sensor and tires and he took care of fixing all this for me this week! I feel bad but I know that he is trying to make sure things are as easy on me as possible before he leaves. Please pray/keep him in your thoughts though. Like I said he is getting really nervous about the trip and getting a job and place to live when he gets there.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Because you need to know more about me part 4

I offered to take questions from a lot of people it seems to be getting me a lot to post about. I have more to do but I am trying to do them in order of when I received them. Surprisingly though with all the questions I've gotten no one has asked the same questions! So it is still fun for me to answer.

This particular set of questions came from Beccy at Peppermint Tea.

Here are your questions, hope you like them!

1) What is the first thing you are planning to do when you arrive in Alaska?

Let's see the first thing? Sleep! haha. It will take us about 4 days to get there in two vehicles on pulling another vehicle and the other pulling a trailer. We will also have all 4 kids with us 2 cats and a hamster. We are still trying to figure out what to do with the cats and the fact they will need to use the bathroom at some point in time on the way up or they will be some uncomfortable kitties!

After that? Hmm I don't really know. I think we will be pretty busy moving things in. Getting the kids ready for school, finding new doctors because as you know we see several different ones and certain parts of the family can't go long without seeing a doctor to get procedures in place such as my iron transfusions.

I also want to figure in some time to look around and see the scenery before the winter sets in and it gets dark all the time and we get snowed in!

2) You have 24 hours where money is no object, describe your day.

Hmm I'd probably start looking for a house if money was no object! Besides that we would take the kids and buy a lot of clothes. Cause we are going to need stuff in Alaska. I am boring I guess when it comes to this one. I don't really know of any places I would want to go with only 24 hours although we may also decide to use money to fly the kids up to Alaska with the cats instead of driving with them all! Honestly I like to shop though. Usually not for myself though. I can see a lot of spoiling going on!

3) What is the most embarrassing thing you have ever done?

Honestly my life is an embarrasment! I do things on a daily basis leaving other people in tears! The most emabarrasing one that I can think of right now was the day I took all the kids to the mall during Christmas when they were little and lost Joshua twice! It was not fun to have the same security gaurd to bring him back and have this child security guard telling me how to watch my child better. If only Joshua would have paid attention it would have been much better. I don't want to tell you how many times that boy has been lost! He is so distracted by things he wants to see that all I had to do when he was little was reach down to grab something for one of the other kids and he was gone. hmm I'm sure if I thought really hard I could think of something better but people keep reminding me of that one....It was awhile before I took all the kids to the mall by myself again. Especially during the holidays.

4) Do you think you spend too much time in the blogging world?

Yes definetly. When I first started this thing it wasn't so bad. I posted occasionally but did really have any other readers besides Becci at miraclebabyb. I looked at some of her other readers sometimes but didn't always have the nerve to comment. I finally did on a couple and pretty soon I had others commenting on my blog, I would comment back and it just went up from there. Now I spend so much time on blogs reading others and posting much, much more on my own. Its a lot more fun to post blogs when I know some one else appreciates them!

Problem is now I tend to read at work whenever I'm not to busy and I get a little to distracted. I can sometimes stay up to late at night writing my own posts and reading others....so yes I spend to much time!

5) Where do you see yourself in 40 years?

40 years? I don't want to think about it....Really.
I do still see myself with Kelly maybe sitting in our rocking chairs enjoying watching our great grandchildren playing.

I don't know if we will still be in Alaska that all really depends on how our health is and if our children stay in Alaska. I always have had this hope my children stay close enough so we can watch their families grown up.

If you wanna play, here’s what you do.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Fun Monday #14

This weeks Fun Monday came from Robin this is what she her challenge was....

"Bloggers are notorious exhibitionists...we bare our hearts...we bare our souls...and sometimes...SOMETIMES...we bare our faces. It's not your face I'm interested in, though...it's YOUR HAIR! Pull out your old photo albums (in this digital age, that's like asking you to pull out your vinyl records, or, egads! your cassette tapes, lol. There's something wonderfully nostalgic about vinyl; there is NOTHING romantic about cassettes!) and find your WORST "BAD HAIR DAY" EVAH! If you're the unfortunate soul who has more than one, well then, post as many as you're willing."

Honestly I am not a hair person, myself. I have never put a lot of thought in it so there have been times you could say everyday was a bad hair day. I know I'm just not very girly that way. Never the less though I will give you some of my more embarassing shots that even I recognize are not so great. Also since I am a mom and always the one on the other end of the camera they are mostly from my much younger days....

don't you love the clothes? I had naturally curly hair and I don't think my mother really knew what to do with it so this is what it looked like most of the time. Honestly my family should be happy I cropped them out as some of theirs were much worse. Like my sister standing next to me with her knee high socks! I was about 3 in this picture.

Then we have me in 1st grade. Hmm do I remind you a little of Princess Leia from the Original Star Wars movies?? Thats what I think of when I see this picture. Again I was nice and cut my brother out.

Here is me in the 3rd grade. I don't know about that cheesy grin.... I'm not fond of this picture either even though Kenzie always says she likes it.

Hmm then I got tired of the curly hair and by this time I had been in gymnastics for several years. I was actually competitive and won alot of awards. The hair was easier shorter. But I think of it now and it was a bit dorky. I'm in the 6th grade here.

My friend Hannah and Everyone I knew was getting perms and I thought "hey theirs look cute! I should get one to." Hmm it didn't work out very well. My own naturally curly hair decided to do just the opposite of what the perm wanted it to do and it was just a big, puffy mess.

This last one in my defense it was morning and only a couple of weeks after Joshua got out of the hospitall. I thought it was cute to because its kind of a bad hair day for Izzak as well.

So there you have it. Honestly I looked for the worst I could find but I have spent more time on the other end of the camera even as a kid I loved taking pictures.

Because you need to know more about me part 3

So Alpha Dude sent me 5 questions for the interview theme going around. The first question....well I think he is trying to get me to tell a story I told him previously on his blog....

Its a good question and probably will take the most of this post! Also I am working on my wedding story post and will have it out tomorrow or Tuesday but I am trying to get something to work for the post so as soon as it works I will post it.

1) You have four children. How did you choose each of their names? With 4 kids you can imagine it can be difficult to come up with names especially when you are into the meaning of names and trying to prevent any embarassing initial problems such as my initials once marrying Kelly which I will reveal to you now TRD, hmm looks okay until you sound it out. There is a story about that and it took me awhile for that to set in.

So to get to the names.....Izzak who some may know his full name is Kelly Izzak Dunn. His first name obviously comes from his dad and his dads name is Kelly also. Personally I am not a big fan of the name Kelly mostly because like my own name it can go either way but more often people think of Kelly as a girls name. We agreed that we would have his first name Kelly because I couldn't take that away from my husband it was a family name and I understood that. We made the agreement though that he would have a different middle name. Partially because I like Gene for my baby boy even less then Kelly! I really like the name Izzak which is normally spelled Isaac and I knew the meaning of the name Izzak was laughter and this was when we were going through all the possible diagnosis of possible down syndrome and he had a heart murmer. The doctors were giving us a lot of bad statistics and I told them that one day he would laugh in their faces for it. When he was born he came out with a smile on his face and his heart was perfect and no downs. I felt the smile was his way of laughing at them. The name Kelly means warrior so Izzak is a laughing warrior! The spelling came from the fact Kelly can't spell and never felt he would be able to spell it the correct way. Incidentaly his initials if you notice spell out KID!

Joshua's name is the one I think Alpha Dude was trying to get me to tell....

We actually didn't choose his name...We knew what his name would be before he was even conceived. Just before that I had a dream and in the dream I was told that we would have a baby boy and his name would be Joshua Robert. Sounds strange to some but its true. It was a very vivid dream and it was like an angel that told me. To bad he didn't tell me how hard it would be to get him here. But if you know his whole story and the fact he really shouldn't be here after all we went through. I almost lost him at 16 weeks and 24 weeks due to severe blood loss. He was born at 32 but had a lot of problems. Joshua means Jehova saves or Jesus saves. I had litteraly hundreds of people praying for both of us and even the doctors said it was a miracle he did as well as he did and that we both survived. It was a scary time but I always had this peace in me that he would be okay after all he was given his name by God as far as I'm concerned and he must have some special purpose for being here. His first year was not fun but like I said I always knew inside he would be okay. Robert also happens to be his Grandfathers name so that part went over well. Joshua Robert means Jehova saves and bright fame! He likes it. So there we have Joshua Robert Dunn....although he would tell you he wants to change his last name so it starts with a K because JRK sounds like jerk! His words honest he told this to us when he was about 7.

McKenzie....I chose her first name when I was 13. I just really liked the name and when Kelly and I were dating I told him that when we got married our first girl would be McKenzie. Originally her middle name was supposed to be Nicole but my sis in law gave her daughter the middle name Nicole and since they were only 9 days apart I didn't want them to have the same middle name. Besides at the time I was irritated at her for getting pregnant on purpose when she was 15! We didn't decide on her middle name until about 6 weeks before she was born. Her middle name is Tamsen. McKenzie means the fair one. Tamsen is actually derived from Thomas which means twin. I was really big with her very early on and people kept teasing me about her being a twin. We got the name from my mother who suggested it because she had seen it in a book. So Kenzies full name is McKenzie Tamsen Dunn. I like the way it sounds and I like that her first name means fair one. I think it fits.

There are several meanings out there for the name Madison bu the one I knew when I named her was "Gods mighty warrior" and her middle name is Torrie which comes from Victoria and it means triumphant. Kelly actually chose her name completely. I always thought he did a good job on it. He really struggled with the middle name for her also and then one day he heard the name Tori somewhere and decided Madison Torrie sounded perfect. So her name means Gods mighty warrior, Triumphant. How is that for a name to try to live up to? Of course she goes by the nickname Maddie and when occasionally Mad which to be honest really fits her sometimes! So she is Madison Torrie Dunn. If you click on her picture you can see better that she is smiling. This is her newborn photo. Honestly I jok we should have known from this photo and her smiling at 5 days that she would have an interesting personality!

Have you noticed something about the girls names? They have the same initials MTD for both. Can you believe we didn't do that on purpose? Honestly we didn't even realize it for awhile after Madison was born....we can be a little slow sometimes.

2) You have just taken office as the first woman US President. What is the first "presidential" thing you will do?

Oh wow that is a hard question. I don't really know. I am so not the person who like to make decisions. Just ask the hubby. I do the same thing the same way all the time. I am a creature of habit! Decisions don't come to me well so I would be a horible president. I would say things like so what do you think we should do?? Its funny the only thing I am any good at deciding on is things that involve my kids. There are a lot of things I would do but the thing that affects our family the most is my kids education. I would love to figure out how to change a lot of things including making in easier for parents to have their kids evaluated for learning problems earlier on. As you all know I had to fight for it for Izzak and it shouldn't be that way.

3) You get to spend the entire day with anyone you choose, famous or non-famous, past, present or future. Who will it be and why?

This is going to sound really corny. But if I had the entire day to spend with anyone I choose it would be my hubby. Hopefully it could be a little more then a day. Doing anything we like together not worrying about anything. Like I've said he is my only true love! We never had a honey moon so being able to do something together and not worry about money or anything else even for a day would be fabulous! See I warned you, corny....but its me!

4) If you could choose what each of your children will be when they grow up, what will they each become?

Okay another corny answer one for me. I want my kids to do or be anything they want to be without wondering if they can make it. Izzak wants to go into the military when he grows up (which would be scary for me) but the way he is right now he wouldn't be able to. Being able to understand what someone is telling you and following directions is very important and with his problems he would have a hard time doing that. I would love for him to be healed of his disabilities so he can do what he wants and be safe. Honestly though I just want my kids to be happy and to not struggle in life when they grow up like we have.

5) Everyone has their favorite pet peeve. What is yours?

Lying. It really bothers me. Wether its out and out lying or skirting around the truth to make things sound better. I just want to know it straight. There are a lot of things people can do to me that I can get over easy but lying is one of those things that I have a hard time with. I feel like I can never beleive them again and it makes me sad to think that of anyone. Mostly because I am a very trusting person when I meet them and just assume they will be honest. Once that trust is lost it hard to get back.

If you wanna play, here’s what you do.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

A Blogger Question

Okay so I have talked to a couple of other bloggers today and they are both having problems with their comments section. Heather hasn't received any of her comments even though I know I have left several this week. Also Alpha Dude is having trouble with his comments getting kicked back to him. It left a strange message on my email saying there was an error and he said its been doing that this week. My problem has been that I have mine comments section set up so that I get an email with the comment but not all are comming through. So I don't know if I am missing some comments. Also I have been having a terrible time getting pictures posted. I get them eventually but I really have to fight for it.

Now I am not all stuck on my comments and neither are they but I am sure they agree with me that the comments are a fun part of blogging. We like to see what people have to say and its kind of a pick me up for me especially when I get such nice comments that I do get from all of you.

My question to all of you is. Are any of you having similar problems with Blogger right now? I am not sure how to go about finding out how to fix it. And I hate to think that all of Heathers comments are lost somewhere in bloggerworld.

Also I know I promised to tell of our wedding story today but I will have it out Sunday. It took forever to get the pictures on it (and they are necessary) and I just need to go to bed as I don't feel like I can write it right now.

How we met.....

So I keep promising our wedding story but I thought I would tell you how we met first. First you can view our senior picture together. We went together to get our senior pictures and wanted to get some of us together. I love this picture of us by the way its my favorite

So the story, right? I should probably get to that....

Honestly I don't know how we ended up meeting. Its strange because we had been to so many of the same places but never met. We actually met in our church youth group. We were good little Christian kids.....sort of.

Actually earlier I had been going to a different youth group but there was a big scandal. It was all about me. I know that sounds egotisticle, doesn't it. Really it was though. I had a couple of friends in the church including my best friend Hannah it was actually through her dads church that he pastored. Anyway there was a girl we were friends with and She, Hannah and I had wanted to plan a sleep over but the youth leaders wife decided to tell the other girls mom some terrible lies about me. I had talked to her husband about a lot of things because there were a lot of things that had happened when I was growing up and being a teenager it was all kind of hitting me at once. He told his wife (which he never should have done) and she told this other person but took some major liberties on it and said some other things that were really bad and totally false making me look like someone I was not. I was actually a really good Christian at the time to so this was a major blow. Hannahs dad did the right thing with the couple as I was close to Hannahs whole family and he was very upset about it. Actually the youth group broke up because everyone in the group was so upset by this.

I had known about this other church that we had actually visited for events with the other group and wanted to try there. I was really hurt at the time and the youth group helped me.

The first time I went to this youth group though there was this group of bigger boys picking on a much smaller boy who was a freshman. They wrapped the boy in duct tape set him on a piano bench and were getting ready to tape him to the wall when the youth leader came in and broke it up. Umm this was the first time I saw Kelly....no he wasn't the little boy :(! He was kind of the ring leader! I thought he was a jerk. Little did I know....

Apparently he noticed me the same time and liked me from then on but actually had a girlfriend at the time and didn't have the nerve to talk to me. That was in January 1993 by April he finally got up the nerve to talk to me but we only talked a couple of times and then he left for the summer as a counselor for the youth camp.

I didn't see him all summer until we had a church picnic at the camp and we talked the whole time. I was to braindead to think much of it. Apparently I was clueless as everyone else told me they could tell he liked me. I didn't even get a clue when he told me that he broke up with his girlfriend. We saw each other again a few times and by August we actually went on our first date! We saw Robin Hood Men In Tights yeah not the most romantic or the best movie ever made but we enjoyed it! From that day on we were together all. the. time. It wasn't long after that I knew we would end up getting married.

We were 17 at the time and in the beginning of your Senior year in high school. My parents loved him. They thought he was great and he got along with my dad very well (still does). His parents.....different story. They didn't like me. I came from a different type of family. We had a nicer house and I had nice clothes. We made a little more money but my parents came from really bad backgrounds and it was always important to them that we had nice clothes. I didn't act like a snob or anything but his parents thought that because we looked like we had more money....honestly i don't really know what they thought....or still think. I know one thing. When I was talking to his dad once about divorce he told me that because my parents had been married before each other that they shouldn't have gotten married after divorce or had children and told me even though my parents were married that I was conceived in sin! Can you beleive that?! I was shocked. My parents had come a long way from where they started and deserved each other and their happiness not this person thinking they were bad.

Kelly also knew we would get married from the begining. He actually started telling people we were going to get married before he asked me. One day I asked him "you keep telling people we are going to get married but you haven't even asked me what I thought yet!" He asked me to marry him in that Taco Bell that day.... Yeah my hubby isn't the most romantic but he makes up for it. Of course we didn't actually tell any one.

I will tell you how we told everyone in the next post about our getting married, later.

The above picture is our prom picture. Kelly didn't want to wear a tux but my dad told him if he was taking his little girl to the prom he wearing one and gave him the money to rent it. After the prom? No we were good we went bowling with friends all in our prom dresses and tuxedos. That was a sight and I wish I had photos. Because that dress with bowling shoes? Interesting site!

Because you need to know more about me part 2

So today Frannie did the 5 question interview and I agreed to answer her questions.

1. Which Friend's character are you most like? (gender not an issue)
Honestly I wasn't a big Friends watcher but I did watch it enough to know about it. Sometimes Joey because I can be really clueless sometimes. Sometimes Rachel and I don't know why just because I could always relate to her when I watched the show.

2. Which blog buddies would you most like to meet in real life?
Hmm thats a hard one. All of them really. I would love to meet Beccy, well because she lives in Ireland and I'd love to go there and its probably the only place I could get the hubby to go out of the country because he is all into his Irish roots! I would also like to meet Peter because then I could figure him out. I think he keeps alot to himself and he hasn't revealed much to us so far...hint hint. Also I want to meet Frannie because I think she is awesome and we have stuff in common like we are the same age. I'm going to meet Heather this summer when we drive to Alaska because she is practically on the way, and I am really excited about that. And I plan on meeting Scribbit soon after we get to Alaska because she will be so close and I really need someone to tell me how to get around! Honestly I would love to meet everyone somehow but I don't see it in the budget anytime soon. Everyone seems like someone I would love to meet otherwise I probably wouldn't be reading your blogs so much....spending time at work where I could get in trouble.

3. If you could take a trip anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Hmm I don't know if I could choose! I have been everywhere on west coast of the US and a little inland but I have never been to the East coast and would love to go. Also I would love to visit Europe and visit England, Ireland, Scotland and of course Germany because while Kelly has a lot of Irish roots I am mostly German and took German in high school for 3 years so that is probably the only foreign speaking country I could go to and have any idea what people would say, although my ability to speak it is not so good anymore

4. Would it just be you and hubby or would you take the little ones?
I probably would bring the kids only because I would love for them to see different cultures instead of just seeing their own little world and how things are where they come from. I would probably bring someone along with us though to help watch them so we could have a little mommy and daddy time though!

5. What is your favorite leisure activity?
Leisure?? Whats that? I don't know this word??
But when I can do something without to much interuption I like to read my blogs and scrapbook. I am very crafty with my scrapbooking and should figure out how to show you some of my work just cause people tell me I'm good at it.

If you wanna play, here’s what you do.
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.(Insert, "Muwahahahaahah!")

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Because you need to know more about me *updated*

*I forgot something, I was supposed to add instructions to play along at the bottom, they are down there now. I forget things at night ya know*

That Chick sent the following questions to me for an interview. She did it on her blog and I thought it would be fun to answer questions someone else might have for me. Also it gives me something else to post about beside complaining about my job. Actually I have a lot to post about but I will hold that for later!


1) What do you think is the main difference between raising boys and raising girls?
Hmm this is a good question and with 2 of each I have alot of experience with both I suppose. The biggest thing I notice with my kids anyway is the way they treat each other. The girls are each others best friends. The don't know what to do when the other isn't there and enjoy doing things together, usually having the same friends outside of school. They play with each other and when one is upset even if the other caused that upset like in this post they are quick to consol (I can't spell) each other even if it means giving up something for the other. My girls anyway even sleep together on most nights. Its easy to get pictures like this.....

The boys on the other hand.....well thats a whole different story. The way they interact is completly different even when they were the girls age. They fight with each other both verbally and physically. Neither one generally cares to make the other happy really. The girls? They never fight physically and they are each others best friend 10 minutes later.

Also the boys are into more physical activities they taught themselves to ride their bikes at 5, Kenzie was 7 1/2 and Maddie still doesn't ride without training wheels.

There are a lot of differences at least in the sense of my boys and girls. I don't know if they all are that way and I'm sure its different with some peoples kids but that is how it is in my house.

A picture like the above of the boys? Well it wouldn't happen. If I get them that close to each other they are usually decking each other :)


2) If you could be someone (anyone!) else for a day, who would you be and why?

I don't know if I would be someone different. I like who I am. If I could have things different. I would be a bit of a stronger person who knew a little better how to fight for her kids. I don't think I would change them or their struggles even though they are hard but it makes them the people that they are. It makes me the person I am. I am a much different person now with my kids then I would be if they were different. I don't think I would want to be someone different because I wouldn't want to have someone elses struggles because no one has the perfect life they all have their own problems.

3) How many different states have you lived in? Which was your favorite and why?

I've commented before that I am a Navy brat. I lived in only 4 states though (soon to be 5). When I was born I was born here in Portland, Or where I live now. When I was 6 weeks old my mother took me my 15 month old brother and 7 year old sister on a Navy plane to an Atole (small island) in the middle of the Pacific Ocean called Midway Island. It was a Navy base and had no cars only a runway straight down the center of the Island. When I was a little over 2 we moved again to Oahu, Hawaii near Pearl Harbor for 3 1/2 years. Then when I was 5 1/2 we moved to San Diego, California which is where I spent the most time. We lived in several houses their including a 5 month stay in Long Beach by the Navy base there. Then back to San Diego. When I was 12 we moved to Oregon but lived in Bay City for about a year and then finally made it back to Portland where I stayed in a couple of houses. When Kelly and I married we moved to Pheonix, Arizona for two very hot years. I longed to come back to Portland the whole time and even missed the rain! We have been back in Portland for 11 years now. Soon we will be moving to Alaska and that is the one I am really looking forward to! I went to 14 different schools growing up by the way!

Which one has been my favorite? Hmm.... I would have to say San Diego. That is where I have the most of my childhood memories. I had a lot of fun experiences and it make me miss those years and the kind of life I had a child. It seemed safer to me. I was allowed to do so many things that I couldn't imagine letting my kids do now.

4) How old were you the first time you fell in love (real love)?

Kelly has been my only true love! We met when we were 17 and new we would be married from the start....Now that blogger is behaving I hope to get our wedding post up tomorrow!

5) If you could have one superpower, what would it be?Have fun! :)

Superpower huh? Hmm....another thinker I guess. I think I would like to be able to fly! Then I could go visit my friends that are now scattered all over the US whenever I wanted to.

If you wanna play, here’s what you do.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” If I don’t have your email address, leave it for me in the comments.

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.(Insert, "Muwahahahaahah!")

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Bad Blogger/Witty Wednesday

No not me. The site. It's. driving. me. nuts. And I really mean it this time!

I am trying to post the story I promised about our wedding and I really wanted to put up pictures with it but blogger won't let me or the computer or whatever and it is making mad!

Okay I'm a little high strung today. Don' t know why just getting nervous like I said yesterday.

What is making it worse this week is I am at my most hated clinic. I feel anxiety about being there from the time I see it on my schedule. It has kept up it reputation for me its the only one I hate going to because of the people. They are so clickish and I hate that. Its like being in middle school and I am the new student even though I have had this job longer then many of them somehow I don't belong. ugg it gets to me. What I hate is its another one on the complete opposite end of town so it takes forever to get there. I have told my boss that I don't like working there and that not long ago last fall I worked there and had a panic attack while working there and the rest of the time I was so stressed out from anxiety that I was ready to lose it and cried on my way to and from work every day. I've told her what happens there and her comment. Basically tough thats your job and you go wherever we tell you. Nice huh? And people wonder why I hate my job......

Thank you for you comments again from my post yesterday. Honestly I'm going to hold everyone up to what they said because I am sure I'm going to need the encouragment to get through Kelly being gone and still working in the meantime. But like I told Kelly today. Everytime something happened at work that upset me I said it loud enough people could hear "only 4 months" then I just left it at that with no explanation. Honestly it felt good and made me smile....hehe.

Okay and since its Wednesday I will brighten up this post with a joke for Witty Wednesday

An Oregon senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership recently. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left."Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-5, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110,then 120.

Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday"."If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused. Then said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with an Oregon State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.

Thanks Beccy!

So several times I have gone to read posts from Beccy's blog and seen that she had these fabulous colages for her pictures. I asked her how to do that and she told me about Picasa and now I think I am addicted.

It's perfect for me! As you all know I love to share pictures and the more I can share the better in my opinion. I love to show people just how cute my kids are and all of our activities we do together.

Even better about Picasa is it is linked to Blogger so you can make your collages or add pictures to your site straight from the Picasa site. Its so easy!

So if I want to share even just a bunch of random pictures its easy see....

Now doesn't that look simple? Really it is.

On another note Kelly is counting down the days before he is done with his work. 8 days left and then he will be here for another week and a half before he takes himself and his things he's taking to Alaska. He does have anothe friend who is going also who is also moving so he won't be driving up himself which is a huge relief to me as well. He doesn't know when he is so tired he needs to stop and has a tendancy to really push himself. I usually have to tell him when we are driving that it is time to stop and go somewhere to sleep when we are going on a vacation where we drive somewhere.

I am a little worried about his leaving though. For myself that is. When he leaves I will be here with the kids myself. Not only is that kind of a scary thought to myself because they are a lot of work plus I will be working full time as well. I just hope I don't get to stressed out from it. Trust me you should be able to tell by my posts and any encouraging words would be well taken and appreciated! The other thing that is sad for me is that we have never really been apart for that long. The longest was about 3 weeks when Izzak and I moved back here from Arizona while he finished up school but at that time I only had Izzak who was 9 months at the time and I was living with my parents so I had a lot of help. I will also really miss him cause like I said we haven't been apart that long before. He grounds me, as in I am the type of person who can get really wound up about things. If its good I can go way overboard and lose track of other things going on. If I am worked up about something and frustrated he helps to calm me down and make me feel better. He is a sounding board for me when frustrated.

Honestly he puts up with a lot with me, he's probably looking forward to getting away from my drama! Honestly I would love to get away from it myself.

The kids are great right now even though the rain does not want to stop. I am working on helping Izzak with another post about his gas powered remote control car. There is a funny story about it but I want him to tell it. We will see about getting that up tomorrow or the next day.

Also take a look at Peters blog to read his poem about the tragedy in Virginia on Monday its another great poem from him. He is a great writer and I wish I could create poetry like he does. It's just not in me.